| Archive for The Magic Bus Trip Never get off the Bus! |
| Dean |
  ALISA!!!
   You DID IT!!!
 to the Journals Forum! Have a seat over here by the window!
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| Jessica |
Alisa, happy to see your journal. 
You're on the right track! Keep going!!! 
Jessica |
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| Heather |
Re: Alisa's Upward Spiral
I know that feeling, I had an awful weekend. 
Let's work through the crap together..... 
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| Susanne |
It's called being pecked to death by ducks!!!
Welcome to the journals, lady! I like your 'steps' to a better you...I'm with you all the way!!!       
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| Suzanne |
Yeah, I'm here for you too! I'm glad to see you here. 
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| Alisa |
Food Today:
2 cups orange-flavored green tea homemade chili (about 1.5 cups beef, peppers, and tomatoes) About 3 oz. macadamia nuts, almonds and pecans 6 oz. flavored coffee *** Wow, nuts are easy to eat. I've never been a big fan, but I enjoyed them tonight. Wait, what did I just say? Oh well, nothing non-LC was consumed today, so score one for me!
I finally bought some new pants. Size 18. Hmm. I've never worn this big of a size even though I've been a lot bigger. I could've gone a size down or so if I had wanted to, but why? I'm so sick of being controlled by that little number. So silly. I think it's a brand geared more towards juniors, but I'm not sure. One thing I did notice, there was a distinct absence of bumps and lumps. Even on my stomach! So this is good. I guess the number did freak me out though, because my old 14s are starting to fit and my 16s are becoming too big. There I go depending on sizes again! Old habits are hard to break LOL. Well, I look and feel good. Plus I can look presentable at work! Good stuff.
Well, off to bed. 
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| Dave |
Hi Alisa,
You can do this. I think it all starts with the food. I am finding that I can start dealing with all the other crap in my life, now that the food is going okay. You can do it! Just believe in your inner strength!
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| Alisa |
Dammit, a coworker brought in doughnuts, and I'm hungry. This is why I need to be prepared. If I have one, I'll have two. But if I end up doing it, you all will be the first to know. Even if I do crappy with the other things, #3 will be strictly adhered to!
I'm at 222.5 this morning. Not too shabby. But not 217.5, where I was a few weeks ago. So far today, I've had nuts and raspberry iced coffee. I need to stop with the nuts. They're too easy to eat. |
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| Susanne |
WAY TO GO ON THE SIZING. I hear you...I can wear 16's, super loose 18's, and can squeeze into a few 14's... BUT WHY WOULD I DO THAT TO MYSELF? I'll be there soon enough - and you will too!
Onward and downward!!!
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| Alisa |
Food today:
20 oz. raspberry-flavored iced coffee 2 oz. nuts beef w/ scallions & onions hot and sour soup (a lot of it!) LC tortilla 2 eggs cheddar cheese LC BBQ sauce mayonnaise Cherry Vanilla Diet Dr. Pepper 1 liter water *** I got really woozy from the Chinese today. MSG, maybe? I had never noticed a sensitivity before. No donuts for me!
Okay, I'm bleary and yawning... time for bed!
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| Jessica |
HI Alisa, how do you make the raspberry iced coffee? regular coffee with ice and sf raspberry syrup? Sounds tasty!
Jessica |
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| Alisa |
I got it from Bruegger's, but it's actual flavored black coffee, not sweetened. I have made something similar at home though, so I'll post it in the recipe section. I had it again today with some half n half and splenda added... it was wonderful!
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| Alisa |
Well, the "attacked from all ends" feeling has only intensified  . But so what? I'm keeping my head up.
Eating has been fine the last few days. Don't feel like posting my menu today. Going to go to sleep. My weight is at 219!
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| Karen |
im being attacked at all ends too alisa..i know the feeling..unfortunately i am failing in the food dept..i am letting all the crap get to me and eating stupid crappy food because of it..so GOOD FOR YOU for passing on the donuts woman!! Eat as many nuts as you want or NEED!!
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| Heather |
Oh Alisa, I am here for you! 
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| Susanne |
WooooooooHooooooooooooo on 219.
Hang in there...this too shall pass, hopefully without too many bodies in your wake. 
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| Bobi |
Yes, Alisa...
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| Alisa |
Well, the attack continues...
Diet has been going good. Too much salt is the primary issue. The scale isn't going to be nice to me for the next few days thanks to that. I need to do a hard and heavy work-out, but I just haven't felt up to it. I'm so emotionally drained it's affecting me physically. I keep reminding myself that all of this will pass, but I'm not quite buying it. What did I eat today? Do I remember? I think I do: 2 homemade LC peanut butter cookies 1 oz. nuts orange-flavored green tea 12 oz. hamburger with melted cheese and grilled onions and mayonnaise 40 oz. Diet Mt. Dew 4 double cheeseburgers, no buns w/ mayo, onion, pickle, and mustard Fruity Iced Coffee with heavy cream, davinci raspberry syrup and splenda *** Not as wholesome as I would prefer, but okay. I'm glad to be back to LC.
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| Susanne |
Your food looks pretty awesome and LC to me!!!!!!!!! Way to go and welcome back. Didn't know you were gone though. 
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| Jessica |
Alisa, hang in there! We're here for you.
Your menu looks tasty... the green tea sounds intrigueing! :) Hugs, Jessica |
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| Heather |
I just posted the same thing in Jessica's journal, then the next post I read are the same, exact words, too weird.
And yes Alisa, I am here for you as well, let's get through this.
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| Dean |
Hey, Alisa!
Looks like you are doing GREAT!
I am so glad you are posting in a journal again.
Keep up the good work!
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| Alisa |
Thanks for the support everyone!
Things haven't been completely straightened out, but I did take today to regroup and think about things. I'm halfway sane, so that's a start! I don't remember exactly what I ate today, but it was LC. That I do know. I made some recipes, and that was fun. I like cooking when I take the time to do it. Some goals for this week: 1. Keep a food log here 2. Start taking my supplements again 3. Drink 3 liters of water per day I'd also like to lose at least 3 lbs. and deadlift 150 lbs. These things are not completely within my control, so I'm not counting them as true goals. It's up to my body whether the lbs. go, and it's up to my finances whether I can squeeze the bucks out for more plates. But I can hope... I also posted progress pics. Not too much progress, but I can see a little bit of change. I'm right around the same weight. Time for bed!
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| Heather |
I cannot seem to lose weight when "I" want, it always comes off in it's own time.
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| Alisa |
Okay, one of my goals has been completed!
I did a 180 lb. deadlift tonight. A couple of them actually!
The three pounds...well...
Eating has been LC overall. Not great, but no breads, no legumes. No alcohol, of course. I went to a Chinese buffet. Avoided breading, dessert, noodles, rice, etc. Still too carby though. Oh, well! I'm trying to get out of binging, and get to some point of normalcy. It's going okay so far. My weight is at 220. No big surprise. I'm not watching my salt intake and I'm not getting enough water. Plus I'm not watching my carbs or calories closely enough to expect much. Well, off to bed!
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| CarolAnn |
Wow, Alisa, you and I are so much alike. I have had a serious problem with binging, too. I still do it every now and then. I will eat without hunger and not stop until I am so full that it feels as if the food is coming back up. 
You will be okay. I have found that it takes me a while to really get back on track once I fall off the wagon, and I fall off a lot. A lot of things set me off, but I am an emotional eater. When I am stressed, 'Past the teeth, past the gums, look out stomach, here it comes'! It sounds like you are doing really well with your eating. Just keep pushing on, and when you least expect it the scales will be friendly!
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| Heather |
Yeah, binging, I wouldn't know anything about that. I think the AS is triggering me, so today I am going to start avoiding again.
Today is a new day, reset, restart and try again.
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| Dean |
WTG! Alisa!
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| Jessica |
Wow!!!
Way to go! You should SERIOUSLY compete in powerlifting!!!!! I'm sure Dan John would wholeheartedly agree!!! Jessica |
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| Alisa |
Whoa, what a nice compliment! Thank you so much! I've thought about it, actually. The whole idea is completely mind-boggling, though... 
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| Alisa |
Well, upon the advice of Steve and others, I am cutting out the crap for a while. So that means no diet soda, LC tortillas, syrups, jams, etc. Here's what I've had so far today:
28 grams whey protein powder .5 oz. heavy cream 8 oz. coffee 10 chicken wingsd with hot-pepper sauce 2 T. ranch dressing 16 oz. water 16 oz. liver revival tea (2 tea bags) 1 lutein, 1 glucosamine, 1 fish oil, 1 CLO, 1 milk thistle
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| Suzanne |
It's a process. You'll get there. Enjoy the ride. 180lbs? Wow!
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| CarolAnn |
Okay, if any bullies get on the bus, I'm sitting with you! OMG, if I had to give up my artificially sweetened junk, I'd keel over! If you can do it, go for it! Maybe you could inspire me. . .that would be a tuff one, though! Go, Alisa!
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| Steve |
Good job Alisa..
giving up the artificial sweetners is tough,let alone the real stuff, but you will see a difference in your moods,energy and your weight loss. Are you taking lutien for eye problems? How about the Milk thistle..cleansing your liver? do you have elevated liver enzymes?? ...or maybe too much Bacardi and coke my dear eh??
My thing was high end tequilla,till it almost killed me. there is a cool bioflavanoid in Milk Thistle(silymarin) that can actually help alleviate depression and that blah feeling people have.. I love Milk thistle ,it is a herb that I know works |
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| Heather |
I am trying to detox from AS myself, good grief, who knew it would be such a struggle?
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| Steve |
It is a nightmare Heather..not only does it do terrible things to the brain, it can also cause havoc on our blood sugar levels.
Think about it. If Aspartame is 200 times sweeter than regular sugar,how is the body supposed to know the diff between the 2 in the way that it is processed? Would'nt it make sense that your body is going to have an even greater influx of insulin while ingesting these artificial sweeters causing low blood sugar levels and inhibiting lipolysis? If man made it don't eat it.. Except the occasional alcholic beverage right?
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| Dean |
 for talking me down! You're the best!
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| Jessica |
That would be so cool!!!! I'll be rooting for you if you do!
Jessica |
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| Alisa |
Weight: 222.5 
Food & Beverages: 2 liters water 20 oz. green jasmine tea w/ key lime wedges 20 oz. iced coffee 4 eggs 2 teaspoons bacon grease 2 cups gyro meat 4 T. gyro sauce .25 cup lettuce 3 tablespoon chopped onion 5 slices bacon 1 tablespoon natural peanut butter 1 oz. blueberry stilton (cheese) 10 slices salami 8 oz. ribs *** Not too good on the eating. Still no fake sweeteners, though. A little more towards natural. I went into full-on binge mode, but I did damage controlled things. I'm okay with that!
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| Steve |
Step by Step..you will ge there
I love greek/Mediterranian food ..I could eat Gyros everyday! |
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| Shawn |
Hi Alisa,
Hope you are having a great weekend! This forum is great! I really am happy to be here. I looked at your pictures in the gallery and you really look good. My coleslaw recipe is: 1/2 cup mayonaise 1/2 cup heavy cream or sour cream 2 tablespoons of vinegar (your choice) 1 tablespoon lemon juice (optional) splenda to taste I taste test to get the dressing right. Have you ever tried "Linda's Low Carb Recipes" forum? She has the best recipes. Take care! |
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| Alisa |
I finally had the nice, refreshing weekend I was craving!
I cannot drink 3 liters of water! I tried, really I did. Maybe one day. I did manage about 2 liters, which is good. Weight: 221 Food has been good. 1 scoop chocolate whey 4 teaspoons heavy cream 12 oz. coffee 14 oz. tuna sashimi soy sauce, low sodium wasabi sesame oil black sesame seeds rice wine vinegar cabbage, marinated with above ingredients tuna melt mushroom slice of broccoli tuna casserole 3 ribs slice of tuna-broccoli casserole 1 scoop whey powder 2 teaspoons heavy cream water A little more than I was planning on. Once I get back to work, I'll probably rein it in a little. Well, it's time for bed.
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| Jessica |
mmmmm! 14 oz of sashimi! I haven't had that in a long time.... yum! I bet you feel awesome after eating it... I always do!
Hugs, Jessica |
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| Alisa |
It gave me a crazy amount of energy as a matter of fact. I miss the raw meat. I need to start incorporating it more.
Today was a good day. 8 small tuna melt mushrooms (quarter-sized) 1 oz. pecans chili (homemade) slice of tuna casserole .5 oz. pecans spinach dip with celery sticks dinner salad with ranch steak fajita, no tortillas, not much of the veggies guac, pico de gallo, lettuce, cheese, sour cream The last meal was an amazing dinner that completely hit the spot. I'm going to try to take it easy on carbs for the next day or two. Bed is calling!
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| Dean |
Alisa,
Looks like you've got your eating plan back on track! Congrats!
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| Jessica |
Just stopping by to say hi!!!
Sounds like you're doing great, keep it up!
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| Alisa |
This morning was fun. First, I got off of the bus, and had guys looking and smiling at me. Then one followed me for a bit trying to get my number. Then one of my co-worker buddies looked at me with wide eyes and said, "Wow, you've lost MAD weight!" Of course I attributed it to watching what I ate and exercise. It's the truth, after all .
That felt really good. I've been doing well lately, I just need to keep going. That's how it usually is; I do good for a while, then I get lazy and all hell breaks loose. In her blog, Renee Cloe (www.skwigg.com) talks about the difference it's made in her journey to switch from focusing on appearance to focusing on what her body can do. She hasn't comepletely transferred over, and neither have I. But I do notice a difference in how I feel about my body now that it does stuff. Apparently I can pick up more than a beer bottle!
Another position is open at work, and I'm qualified! I'm going to apply. Thank you to all of you for being there! I didn't know if I was going to make it through for a little bit. I had three cigarettes today. Damn smoking buddies! I do miss the interaction I used to have, though. But I think the next time I go out, I'm just taking a water bottle to keep my mouth occupied. I know the next time I do cardio, my lungs are going to get me back for my indiscretions. I'm not even tempted to buy a pack, so that's good. I just need to be careful I don't get back into the habit. |
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| Suzanne |
Keep it up. You're doing great! | ||||
| Dave |
Alisa,
You are doing really well! I reckon there would be a lot of hopeful lads pursuing you! I think we all underestimate our looks sometimes. I have found in my journal that focus has shifted from my physical appearance to one of Health maintenance. Honestly I credit Dr. Atkins and Low Carb community for this. Because Low Carbers seem to be massively into health, and it's not about appearance. I Find the Calorie/Low Fat people are more heavily into appearance. |
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| Alisa |
Food today:
1/2 Reese's Cup Chocolate Blizzard Smoothie (made with 2 scoops chocolate whey protein powder, a squeeze of pre-melted baker's chocolate, 2 cups coffee, ice, 1/4 c. Walden Farms chocolate sauce, a splash of heavy cream, and 2 teaspoons natural peanut butter) 8 small tuna mushrooms 1 slice tuna casserole LC cocktail sauce caesar salad dressing 1/2 Reese's Cup Chocolate Blizzard Smoothie 1/4 of LC tortilla pizza (crushed tomatoes, anchovies, salami, cheese) 1/4 of LC tortilla pizza (caesar dressing, anchovies, feta, spinach, cheese) 8.5 oz. beef, seared on the outside ranch dressing, horeradish mayo, and Italian dressing for dipping *** Today was all about comfort foods, but I didn't fare so badly. I couldn't believe how good the smoothie was! And everything in it was "legal." It has finally clicked in my head that I can do LC for the rest of my life! 
I'm down to 218 lbs. It feels good. I have a new goal I'm calling it "200 by 200." I want to be able to do 10 reps of a 200 lb. deadlift by the time I weigh 200 lbs. This is doable, but I will have to work hard. I got 180 off of the ground a couple of times, but it was rough. This is definitely a challenge! I may post more swimsuit pics this weekend. I don't know if they'll look too different from the ones posted. But it's time to do an update. If they don't look different enough, then it's time to really get my ass in gear!
Off to bed I go!
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| Steve |
Let's see some pics...
can I make a suggestion? I know there will be people who do not agree withme on this, but Imo the deadlift should not be a high rep excercise.. I know a bunch of powerlifters who say you should never og above 3 reps though I have seen some go to 5. The problem is form and losing grip power and staying tight especially if you are not using wraps. How about something like building up to 10 sets of 3 where you put all you can into every rep of every set. You just can't concentrate and maintain good lifting dynmaics with high reps on the deadlift. I'm curious as to what Dan John thinks..I know Dave Tate and Pavel don't like high reps in the dead.. |
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| Alisa |
You're probably right on this. When I was weaker and could only handle about 20-40 lbs., I worked more on reps than weight. Now that I'm getting into real weights, I probably should cut down and put my all into a few lifts. This also explains the problem I'm having with grip .
So that will be my new goal: 200 by 200, but with 200 lbs. being lifted for 10 sets, 3 times a piece. BTW, did you see the Tate/Berardi project on T-Nation? That was amusing. I need to check to see what ended up happened. And you'll get your damn pics! I will be doing them this weekend, painful as it may be!
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| Steve |
Well I don't want to put you out or anything..
John Beradi and I have corresponded through e-mail, he's pretty sharp though I don"t agree with a lot of his diet suggestions..way to many carbs!! Your grip will improve..I went on a pavel deadlifting regimen and my grip got better every workout. But I did lots of sets and low reps, and I reset my grip for every rep. not really necessary for straight leg deads,but you have to stay tight and not go beyond the "stretch" you feel in your hamstrings.. alisa,I'm sure you could do 200 now if you did the Sumo Deadlift Stand like you are going to deadlift but with your legs spread wider and your toes pointed out a little. Now squat down to pick up the bar,your hands will be inside,between your knees instead of out side. Now explode up and push yourself away from the floor.. You seem to have the body mechanics and structure for this variation of the dead..plus your quads will get a huge workout.. |
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| Alisa |
This weekend was, um... um... well, let me just make note of what I did and move on.
Saturday: On plan til the evening, then 12 (yes, 12) Michelob Ultras. Sunday: hot sausage, hot dogs, birthday cake, Pasta with Alfredo sauce, wedding soup, bite of Black Tie Mousse cake, Breadstick... It was tasty. Here's what I had today: 1 oz. pecans 5 oz. ground sirloin .5 c. broccoli 1 packet mayo 1 packet soy sauce 12 oz. coffee 1 scoop protein powder dash of heavy cream dash of sf chocolate sauce chicken breast drizzle of caesar dressing *** Much, much better today. Carbing up is fun. I have too much fat to lose, so I want to try to keep it to a minimum, though. We'll see how I feel. Just for the record, I was seriously considering not saying a damn thing about what happened this weekend. But if I'm going to bother keeping a journal, I may as well be honest.
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| Suzanne |
pffft! You're back on track. It's all good.
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| Dean |
Yah... just keep posting EVERYTHING you consume, and watch how quick you get back on track!
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| Susanne |
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| jeff |
Bobi, we must not be doing our job very well. Better pick up the pace. 
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| Alisa |
Yeah, really. I drank for BOTH of YOU! What's wrong with this picture?! Less typing, more drinking, you two!  
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| Bobi |
My oh My oh My!!! 
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| Alisa |
Oh, good. You're up to the challenge. I'm feeling more sober already!
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| jeff |
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| Susanne |
Hey, woman...you're slacking in the journal department! Even if you're being naughty, tell us all about what you're indulging in and 'stuff'. K?
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| Dean |
I have to second this!
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| Alisa |
Saturday:
Ate LC almost all day, then at night I had a few slices of hawaiian pizza, a breadstick, vodka, pineapple juice, 2 pony bottles of Rolling Rock... Sunday: Powerade, little bit of ice cream (actually put it back after a few bites!), a few slices hawaiian pizza, pasta with various sauces, breadsticks, zuppa toscana, soft-serve ice cream, a sugar cookie, a piece of lemon-poppyseed cake. Consumed throughout the day, not in one sitting by the way. Today: 2 double cheeseburgers, bunless with mayonnaise 1 oz. chipotle cheddar cheese 4 fish oil caplets 2 bags decaf green antioxidant tea 1 oz. chipotle cheddar cheese 1 sccop vanilla whey 3 tsp. heavy cream 12 oz. coffee splash of LC chocolate sauce 1 scoop chocolate whey 2 tsp. heavy cream splash of LC chocolate sauce 4 eggs few oz. homemade taco meat sprinkling of cheese dollop of sour cream .5 T. salsa I feel good about my choices today. My weight has been hovering in the high 210's/low 220's, but people keep commenting on my weight loss...  WTF? Oh, well. I'm not complaining.
I think I'm going to either skip the carbs this weekend, or at least stick with fruits and veggies. Maybe some rice. I want to not drink for at least a month. My real goal is not to drink until my friends' Thanksgiving party. That's (obviously) in November. I started taking RapidLean, made by Six Star Body Fuel. I took it for the first time this morning. Woooo! I was flying around like a bat out of hell! It mainly has a bunch of tea extracts and caffeine. It didn't make me sick or jittery, so I'm going to stick with it.
Feeling pretty good!
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| Alisa |
Got really, really bad news today. I'm now a big ball of tears and nerves. I feel like quitting everything, my heart is hurting, literally... just trying to damage-control, but the binge is going to happen. Once I make it over this I hope I'll be okay... | ||||
| Karen |
HUGGS AlisA!!!
i am so sorry to hear this! i hope you are ok!
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| Dean |
I'm so sorry to hear this, Alisa. I hope you will be OK. Please post and let us know how you are doing. We do care.
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| Suzanne |
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| Heather |
Oh Alisa, I am here and can feel your struggles. I wish I could be closer.
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| Shawn |
Alisa,
I hope everything is okay...take care.
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| Steve |
Hang in there gorgeous...you know if you need everything there are a bunch of great people here ready to help you in anyway that you need.
besides you are our fearless leader right? Much love
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| Karen |
Alisa,
i am worried about you..i hope you are ok..please let us know how you are doing!!
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| Shawn |
Hi Alisa,
I just use yoga tapes. If you are interested I will suggest a few to start out with. I am endulging for a few days with food . On Saturday I am going back to my low carb eating plan.
Take care.
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| Alisa |
The support is most appreciated.
Things are still semi-shitty. My eating has been awful. I was planning to start back today, and it just didn't happen. I'm in "numb my mind" binge-mode, mind you. I've been eating like crazy, and I'm making myself physically ill. I need to get a grip and get on with things. I still haven't drank though, and my cigs have been at about 2-5 per day. If only I could orchestrate things so that I'm doing many things right at the same time... I haven't really done much heavy exercise, which hasn't helped my mood. Too bad sulking and eating candy bars doesn't burn more calories. I'd be so hot right now. Well, I'll be dusting myself off shortly. Time for bed!
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| Suzanne |
Come sit over here by me Alisa. I've been on the same crazy, out of control spiral. Today, you start taking care of YOU!
Congrats on the no booze, less cigs. That's a lot to do at one time. Here ya go. Just know that I love you and believe in you!
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| Shawn |
Hope things start to go better for you...take care!
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| Alisa |
Thanks Suzanne and Shawn!
I did a 200 lb. deadlift tonight (as long as the bar counts) but other than that I'm still being a jackass. protein shake shrimp butter spices green tea coconut oil protein shake pineapple and ham pizza breadsticks garlic dipping sauce cannolis *** Um, yeah... I was cool up until dinner. I tried pineapple on pizza about a month ago and I've loved it ever since. No more for a long while. Or maybe I could sneak a few pieces on KevinPA's version... )
I still ate too much today, but one meal isn't as bad as it could've been. Maybe I can do better tomorrow. Bedtime!
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| Alisa |
I did better today. Carnivorous save for some dill relish and sesame seeds. Lots of fish. Protein is way too high. More tomorrow.
Bed!
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| Dean |
Good job, Alisa!
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| Suzanne |
I'm glad you had a good day!
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| Shawn |
I'm glad you are starting to feel better!
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| Alisa |
I got sick with what I think was the flu and my eating went to shit.
I decided to get back on. Friday's weight was 226.5. Since I was prepared to access the damage, I was actually pleasantly surprised. I was scared I was going to see the 230's again!
Today, the scale said 220.5! Water weight is gone, apparently. This is with moderately heavy lifting yesterday and a slice of wheat bread (6 carbs/slice) with 2 teaspoons of natural PB. Come to think of it, food for yesterday: chicken salad with mayonnaise and dill relish beef with bacon wrapping mayo and mustard tea w/ coconut oil very small small slice of crockpot pork (very fatty) 1 teaspoon duck fat 4 eggs 1/2 cup 4% cottage cheese (4 carbs) 20 oz. diet grape soda 1 slice wheat bread (6 carbs) 2 teaspoons natural peanut butter So far today: small sip Godiva coffee drink
assorted cold cuts (roast beef, turkey, cheese, etc.) mustard mayo a few small lettuce leaves tea w/ coconut oil boneless, skinless chicken breast mayonnaise jalepeno mustard 1/2 cup cottage cheese *** I had wanted to try the Godive iced coffee drinks, so I had a sip of Amber's. Eh. I prefer my coffee with some splenda and some heavy cream, to be honest. Or some protein powder. I'm glad I didn't bust 30 carbs on a whole one. 10 lbs. from now, I will weigh 210.5 lbs. 11.5 lbs. from that I will weigh 199 lbs. What the hell am I waiting for?! Please people, keep me accountable. I'll make it worth your while!
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| Dean |
Uh... Alisa... I think it was the other way around: your eating went to shit... and then you got sick with what seemed like the flu...
Just trying to keep you "real".
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| Alisa |
Um, yeah, thanks.
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| Bobi |
We'll keep you real, Alisa!!!
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| Alisa |
Last night was drunken stupidity.
Eating was stupid today. small steak salad with gorgonzola, walnuts, caesar dressing broccoli cheddar soup sour dough roll turkey mashed potatoes stuffing candied sweet potatoes green bean casserole 1/2 med. DQ oreo blizzard pork rinds salsa *** On a good note, I now have very little food in the house that should be considered off-limits. The challenge will be keeping it that way. I have so many stressful things going on that are making this harder than it has to be. But I can't let that hold me back. To not take care of myself will cause more stress, whether it be now or later. My hope in myself is running out, but there's still a little there. We'll see what tomorrow brings.
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| Suzanne |
I still have plenty of hope for you. Here, I'll share.
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| Bobi |
Alisa, you can do it! We are all here for you, please remember that. I tried to contact you yesterday before I went out, but you didn't reply.
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| Alisa |
Another stupid food day. I need to regain control. I'm going to regain all of the damn weight I've lost. Well, maybe not, but a bunch of it...
Why am I doing this to myself? Tomorrow... we're going for tomorrow. Seriously. Tomorrow! Okay, then. That's better!
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| Susanne |
Keep trying, every day - eventually, it'll grab on to you and not let go!
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| Steve |
Alisa,
What you must do is tell youself,you do not want to be diseased as you get older,losing weight is important,but the high carbs and non-nutrtional foods are just wreaking havoc with your health. I am the best example of this..in my 20' lifting weights,clubbing,following a high carb diet that was suppopsed to be good for you. Even though I switched to a lower carb diet the damage had been done. I had a bout with cancer,I'm prediabetic, I have cardiovascular damage and at 42 I'm trying to regain my health. Could genetics play a part? Absolutley,but over the last couple of years,I have not excercised and f'd up on my diet and now I'm paying dearly. Not a good place to be for someone in the health industry. Ironic isn't it? So ask yourself the next time you feel the need to screw up your healthy eating, what damage am I doing to my body and my health? What will my health be 20 years from now? I'm not trying to be an ass at all. I just don't want you to become ..me Eat for your health,the weight will take care of it self..trust me. much love
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| Alisa |
Thanks for the lecture!
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| Alisa |
The above was sarcasm, Steve, just for the record! Of course I appreciate the input.
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| Steve |
I just want to help... if I had said something to my mother earlier and intervened and said some things she didn't want to hear, may be she'd still be alive .
I think sometimes we don't looka t the nutritional value of food... Just is this going to make me gain weight? I've been in shape almost my whole life, I've never been a overweight person..but unbeknownst to me I had the genetic makeup for sensitivity to carbs and my steady eating of these macronutrients just saturated my cells with glucose and now my receptors have basically shut down. so I'm not lecturing you.. I want you to be healthy ya' little beauty |
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| Susanne |
My mother had uterine cancer this year. The ONLY risk factor she had was obesity and everything that goes with it (trashing one's blood sugar with carbs and constant dieting, etc.) She's also celiac.
She never smoked, never drank, never did recreational drugs, never engaged in high-risk sex. She just ate the wrong stuff for too long. I do NOT want to have cancer or heart disease (which both run in my family). I want to be alive. I hear you, Steve. It's hard to face, but you are SO right. It scares the hell out of me.
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| Shawn |
Hey Alisa,
Hang in there...something good will happen to inspire you to start again.
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| Alisa |
Thanks, Shawn!
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| Alisa |
Just for the record, how many people during their 20's have a real grasp of the consequences of their actions on their future health?! I get glimmers here and there. I know but I don't feel. Hindsight is 20/20, and some things (most things) have to be learned through personal experience or personal reflection.
Some days I have it, some days I don't. I don't know what's right. So many studies conflict each other, most seem straight-up wrong. I'm trying to ditch all of these bad habits, but there's parts of me that keep holding onto them. For what? Security! After all, I used to define myself by my habits. It's hard to let go sometimes. I love the carb coma. I love eating fast food and just sinking into the "no think" zone, where things are safe and fuzzy. Failing at stuff is fun. Once you can't lower your standards anymore, the only way to go is up, right? You don't have to expect anything from yourself. But at the end of the day, I'm tired of the nonsense. I wonder when I will change. And then I look back and realize that I have. I'm no longer the girl whose anxiety and depression kept her off of work for weeks on end. I don't drink so much that I pass out then throw up in the mornings. Most days I can avoid multiple fast food meals. I can stand up for myself. I'm getting better about dealing with issues, instead of bottling them up, or acting out inappropriately. So while I still have a long way to go, I have already gotten somewhere closer to "normal." I need to map things out and come up with a realistic plan that I can actually stick with. I'd love to be 180 lbs. by the time of my birthday, March 20th. But that's just going to be a hollow dream if I don't set out plans to get there. Time for bed!
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| Steve |
susanne,now I have a 17 month old boy.How am I going to be there for him when he needs me most? How will his life be having a diseased dad?
I want to be athletic for him and get him involved in sports and be a coach. Hell will I see be around at 50? that's what wakes me at night.. You're right Alisa,nobody thinks about there health at 20. We party,we work hard, we grab anything to eat..but like I said,I was always excercising and ate pretty good food (so I thought). but I would stay out till 4:00 in th emorning ,go to work at 7:00 get off and do it all over again. Again, I just want to be the example..it can happen if you aren't dilligent and don't take care of yourself. I know duh..but I would of never thought that through the years |
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