Sol
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Carnivore humor, sort of :)Why did the chicken cross the road?
My favorite is the quote from Colonel Sanders. Which one is yours?
BARACK OBAMA:
The chicken crossed the road because it was time for a CHANGE!
The chicken wanted CHANGE!
JOHN MCCAIN:
My friends, that chicken crossed the road because he recognized
the need to engage in cooperation and dialogue with all the chickens
on the other side of the road.
HILLARY CLINTON:
When I was First Lady, I personally helped that little chicken to
cross the road. This experience makes me uniquely qualified to ensure
- right from Day One! - that every chicken in this country gets
the chance it deserves to cross the road. But then, this really
isn't about me...
DR. PHIL:
The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that
he must first deal with the problem on 'THIS ' side of the road
before it goes after the problem on the 'OTHER SIDE ' of the road.
What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he's acting
by not taking on his 'CURRENT 'problems before adding 'NEW' problems.
OPRAH:
Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is
why he wants to cross this road so bad. So instead of having the
chicken learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of
life, I'm going to give this chicken a car so that he can just drive
across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens.
GEORGE W. BUSH:
We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just
want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not.
The chicken is either against us, or for us.
There is no middle ground here.
COLIN POWELL:
Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite
image of the chicken crossing the road...
ANDERSON COOPER - CNN:
We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet
been allowed to have access to the other side of the road.
NANCY GRACE:
That chicken crossed the road because he's GUILTY! You can see it
in his eyes and the way he walks.
PAT BUCHANAN:
To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.
MARTHA STEWART:
No one called me to w arn me which way that chicken was going.
I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs
when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird
gave me any insider information.
DR SEUSS:
Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad?
Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not
been told.
ERNEST HEMINGWAY:
To die in the rain. Alone.
JERRY FALWELL:
Because the chicken was gay! Can't you people see the plain truth? '
That's why they call it the 'other side. 'Yes, my friends, that
chicken is gay. And if you eat that chicken, you will become gay too.
I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination
that the liberal media white washes with seemingly harmless phrases
like 'the other side. That chicken should not be crossing the road.
It's as plain and as simple as that.
GRANDPA:
In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody
told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.
BARBARA WALTERS:
Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to
the chicken tell, for the first time, the heartwarming story of how
it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish
its life long dream of crossing the road.
ARISTOTLE:
It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.
JOHN LENNON:
Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together,
in peace..
BILL GATES:
I have just released eChicken2007, which will not only cross roads,
but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your
check book. Internet Explorer is an integral part of the Chicken.
This new platform is much more stable and will never cra..
.#@&&^(C% <mailto: cra...#@&&^(C%> ....
reboot.
ALBERT EINSTEIN:
Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath
the chicken?
BILL CLINTON:
I did not cross the road with THAT chicken.
What is your definition of chicken?
AL GORE:
I invented the chicken!
COLONEL SANDERS:
Did I miss one?
DICK CHENEY:
Where's my gun?
AL SHARPTON:
Why are all the chickens white? We need some black chickens.
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Valcan
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Hi,
I liked the one from Dr. Seuss.
Thanks for posting that, I needed a good laugh.
Val
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Heather L
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I liked the one for Aristotle. It takes me back to my college philosophy classes  ... more fun than humans should be allowed to have.LOL
It might be even better if he asks how we can really be sure that the chicken is crossing the road... after all what is true?? Do I really see a chicken crossing the road, or do I just think that I am seeing it?  Maybe I am just seeing a reflection of a higher reality...
Pass the Kool Aid. 
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Travis
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Neo from the matrix
"there is no chicken"
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Dean
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Why did the chicken cross the road?
What, are you kidding?! 
Obviously, the chicken saw the Bus comin' down the road, and wanted to get to the Bus Stop on the other side. She knew just how much all of us carnivores chicken. Except, I think Nicola may have let her out. 
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~mina~
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| Quote: | AL GORE:
I invented the chicken! |
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Heather
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| ~mina~ wrote: | | Quote: | AL GORE:
I invented the chicken! |
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That's the one that I was laughing at too!
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